Our Coolest Non-Fishing Expeditions

You don’t need to go fishing for a vacation to be great.

“Alex, what is ‘Things I never thought I’d write’ for a thousand?”

Yes, it’s true. While we are classic “maximizers,” trying to eke out every bit of fishing time that we can, occasionally we make non-fishing detours, or entire trips where we don’t make a cast – and we enjoy them.

Here are five of our favorites, in no particular order:

Alaska Dog Sledding

As I wrote previously, during our 2020 trip to Alaska we spent about 36 hours in the town of Girdwood, a short drive from Anchorage. While the price of our hotel room was decreased because of COVID, it was not an inexpensive side trip, partially because we spent over $400 each on a two-hour trip that entailed a helicopter ride to a glacier to meet up with a dog-sledding team. We could have gone on just a helicopter sightseeing trip, or just a low-altitude dog sled ride for much less. We even could have gone on a wonderful hike for free, but we bought into the package and we have no regrets whatsoever. It was the totality of the experience that made it so special.

Lesson Learned: Sometimes, if you can afford it, it does not make sense to be budget conscious. Buy the “gold” package and savor every minute of it.

Lions in Africa

Our three-week trip to southern Africa in 2016 was special from start to finish. In fact, while we caught in incredible tigerfish, you honestly could have removed the fishing portion of the trip and it would have been one of the best two or three vacations of our lives so far. In Zimbabwe and Zambia, we saw a total of 41 lions in the wild. In between those two countries, at Victoria Falls, we visited an animal sanctuary where we got to walk with untethered young lions. I don’t know if they were drugged or just tame, but they had no interest in messing with us – they just wanted to get back to their pens and get fed. It was exciting to be that close to them, but cooler was a day at The Hide in Zimbabwe’s Hwange National Park. We were called to a watering hole where a lion was guarding her kill – a fresh Cape Buffalo – from jackals and vultures. Meanwhile, a group of cubs, seeking respite from the blistering heat, sought out some of the little available shade: under the safari vehicle. They sat there for quite a while, oblivious to our presence, as we gawked and snapped hundreds of pictures.

Lesson Learned: The real thing is better than the contrived version.

Caiman Hunting

On our first two trips to the Amazon, in 2011 and 2012, each time we went out for evening caiman hunts. The process: drive around in the dark-as-the-inside-of-a-cow’s-ass night, shining a spotlight until you recognize their eyes. On the first trip, we shot one for dinner, put him up on the bank for safekeeping and went out to look for others. When we came back, he was gone. He hadn’t recovered from the bullet, but rather just drifted a short distance away. Later we had delicious fried caiman tail nuggets as well as stew thanks to his sacrifice.

Another night we went out to try to capture a live big’un. The guides found one with “enough space between his eyes,” left us gringos in the boat in the dark, and hopped out into the muck. From about 30 yards away we heard a bunch of thrashing as our two five-foot-nothing jungle guides tried to corral the reptile. They succeeded, and lassoed/taped his mouth shut. Suddenly the still-breathing critter was in the boat with us. We took him back to the houseboat, posed for pictures and let him go.

Lesson Learned: Always take the extra excursion. After a long day of fishing it would’ve been easy to kick back and go to sleep, but you’ll always remember those “extras.”

Swimming With Sharks and Rays

We honeymooned in Tahiti, primarily on the islands of Moorea and Bora Bora, and one of our excursions was to a reef where we could swim with sharks and rays. At the first stop, we were told to hold onto a rope and breathe through a snorkel as the guides chummed in front of us. Sharks of varying sizes quickly appeared to feed on the buffet. We were told that the sharks would stay in front of us, but at one point I looked behind us and there were just as many – if not more – circling around in wait. I don’t believe we were in any danger, but it was a little jarring to see all of that wildlife around us. Later we swam with the tame rays – who were happy to climb up on your chest for a meal. Again, there was no real threat of harm, but when you’re on vacation – especially in a second- or third-world country, and especially if the alcohol is flowing – don’t let your guard down.

Lesson Learned: Enjoy the moment but stay vigilant in the wild.

Kyoto Hostess Bar

On our 2007 trip to Japan, we spent time with Seiji Kato and Ty Ono, the brains behind Jackall Lures. After a full day at their factory, eating lunch and tackle shopping, they asked us if we’d like to join them for dinner. We gladly accepted. Ty drove us back to our hotel, told us to rest up, and said he’d pick us up a few hours later.

They took us out for an incredible meal of Korean barbecue, and when dinner was done asked if we’d like to go out for a drink. Again, we accepted. We walked down a cobblestone street, stopped at a rustic building that looked like it was out of the 12th century, and Seiji knocked. A man in a tuxedo came to the door and invited us in. Inside, it looked like a New York City nightclub. The host escorted us to a private room, where we sat around a table. They brought out Seiji’s personal bottle of whiskey, poured us glasses, and we toasted.

A few minutes later, a group of attractive Japanese women in tight dresses filtered in. I didn’t know what to think. Were they giving me my choice? What would my wife think? [Note: I did not ask, “Do I have enough cash?”]

Turns out they were not there to provide services, but rather to serve as hostesses. They poured drinks. They cut up fruit into little animal shapes and fed it to us. Then, as the booze flowed, they brought out the karaoke machine. Seiji rocked out to “Take Me Home, Country Roads,” which I later found out is a Japanese staple. I stumbled through a number of my own. Hanna demurred. Then one of our hostesses belted out some Whitney Houston.

I don’t remember going home that night, but I remember just about everything else about it. I’m also certain that I went home with Hanna.

Lesson Learned: [Per Chris Rock: There’s no sex in the champagne room] Seriously, though, we tend to tightly script our vacations. Every minute is planned or accounted for. Sometimes the best memories come when you just go with the flow and embrace the unexpected.